Let me help you “Turn Your Love Around”
“Patricia, I need some help with my love life. I’m tired of it not working out. When I think about having to date and muddle through all the wrong guys on dating sites I get depressed. I want marriage and family more than anything, but I’m not sure how to get past my EX and put myself out there again. Help “
I serve because one time in my life I was just like many of the women I coach and those who email me with questions about the relationships they’re in and wondering how do I let go, can I let go and if I do, how do I start over again?
Some years ago, I was in a toxic relationship and no matter how badly he treated me I kept going back! I didn’t know who I was or what I wanted and when he told me, “I’ll stop cheating,” or “I love you, you’re the only one for me,” I believed his lying lips because they tasted and looked so good. I know it sounds crazy but I just didn’t know how to leave this man alone. He was in my head and my heart and regardless of how he treated me I kept going back.
I was tired of crying and sick of trying and I was ready to break free and move forward but I didn’t know how or where to begin. I was tired of the life I was living because I knew it was not pleasing to God.Until one day, I shared what was going on in my life with someone I trusted and she gave me the inside scoop on how she moved forward after her divorce years before and got in position to receive the love of her life.
I took the information she gave me and started where I was. It wasn’t easy because at first, when he called and said, “what are you doing?” I’d immediately respond with “whatever you want me to be doing” because I was sick in love I thought, but I later found out what I thought was love was really lust.
I made a conscious decision that I was going to follow the steps given to me so I could get the love I desired and deserved.
I learned how to let go of the emotions I invested in that man so I could walk away and never look back.
I acknowledged how he made me feel. For once, I got truthful with myself and looked at how I played a part in this sham of a relationship.
Then I released the emotions I invested in him by writing a letter to him, reading it to my marriage mentor and burning it as an act of freedom.
After that, I moved forward by learning how to set boundaries. Something I did not know how to do before meeting him. Setting boundaries was for me and not for him. Boundaries helped me identify behaviors I would and would not tolerate and the boundaries I established for myself taught me who I was as a child of God and how much He valued me.
Setting boundaries helped me to stop wasting my time on the wrong man and focus on what God planned for me. I was no longer dating every man that asked me out; instead, I was dating with the purpose of finding out if he knew who he was.
When a man knows who he is then he will see you for who you are and that’s a wife for life, not a girlfriend to the end.
So here I am, thirty years later with my one and only husband all because I sought the wisdom and guidance of some seasoned women who helped me get in position to receive the love of my life. If I had to do it all over again, I would still say, “I Do.”
Original of the video here
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