TWCS – Episode 4 (Relationship Advice and R. Kelly’s Ball Sweat)

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welcome back to the only podcast  sponsored by our Kelley’s ball sweat  let’s talk about my recent findings  being you know introspective okay so  this is uh this is that whole create  fake personas to exist around people  think it’s it’s it’s self-destructive  it’s not it’s not healthy someone else  out there might be doing it so if you do  this I’ll tell you what I’m doing to fix  it alright so I have this habit of like  creating a relationship where it doesn’t  belong and the way I do it is it’s like  I’m not it’s I’m not finding friends I’m  picking somebody and I’m adapting so  that they become my friend that’s that’s  bad well unless it’s for the better you  mean there’s this there’s there’s a  debate on to be had on change in a  relationship so like like well like okay  hey girls do this a lot alright so  you’ll be in a relationship with a girl  and you’ll break up and she’ll be like  yeah you tried to change me and then you  won’t talk to her and then you guys end  up talking like three months later and  she’s like I’m a different person now  but bitch that’s that’s why we broke up  and that that happens a lot um so it’s  it’s really not about change a  relationship is supposed to change you  and if someone’s like oh you’re trying  to change me too much what they usually  mean is either you’re trying to strip  them of something that’s something that  brings them joy whether it be good for  them or not that’s usually what they  mean  so not all change is bad for instance if  you’re in a relationship with a heroin  addict and you make him stop doing  heroin that was a positive change you’re  not trying to control him in a negative  way you trying to help him better  himself that’s not the same thing if  you’re with somebody and they’re there  like falling behind in school or  something and you know you you’re like  hey maybe you should better allocate you  Tom so that you don’t you know spend all  this time goofing off that’s not that’s  not a bad thing that’s not a bad change  and you know it may better the  relationship now if someone does a bunch  of those all the time then yeah it’s  probably a bad thing you do have to  accept people’s flaws you have to accept  them because you’re not ever you’re  never gonna get rid of all we’re people  everybody’s fucked up everybody’s wrong  a good half of the time at least now  what I’ve been doing to mitigate this  problem I have this fake persona is is  whenever I’m talking to somebody and I  feel like I didn’t get my point across  the right way or I feel like there’s  something I wanted to say but I didn’t  say it I found a way to you know beat  around the bush or just don’t give him  like a half assed response I forced  myself to say it no matter the  consequences I don’t care if it ruins  the conversation I don’t care if it’s  too late I don’t I don’t care if it  stops the conversation like deadens  tracks I don’t care if it makes it  awkward I don’t care if it embarrasses  me I do it and what I’m gonna do is I’m  gonna eventually train myself into just  doing this all the time and that way the  awkwardness fades out of it and you know  I get my points across and Who I am  gets an opportunity to bleed through  instead of some persona that I’m  carrying because the last thing you want  to do is is build a relationship with  somebody and then you know don’t get  bored of that persona and then your your  creative side be the real you and you  don’t have access to that create  so there’s no there’s no possible  rebound and I think that’s honestly why  our relationships last right around that  two-year mark is because it’s how long  it takes me to run out of material so  and I think they just they they they see  me for who I am and then they’re like I  don’t like discount and you know that’s  a that’s that’s I think it’s been a  problem for me pretty much my whole life  um but I’m working on it now and if  you’re out there and you’re having  similar issues and I urge you to kick  your own ass because a good 90% of the  time and you your biggest problem is  yourself I mean that may sound recycled  that’s really true there really is true  a lot of a lot of problems a lot of  especially social issues and anxiety and  things like that they can be solved by a  change of attitude or just a reset on  your mentality you can come out of a lot  of a lot of nervousness just just by  going nah fuck that I mean like I  actually have to say it look out loud to  myself like fuck that ain’t doing it I  don’t think I don’t think I should ever  have kids though cuz I can’t  I usually don’t know that I’m fucking up  until it’s too late  so I mean like like something I would  fear when having a kid is they fuck up  tremendously and then they resent me for  it because I gave them shitty advice  now I’ve already forward to get somebody  pregnant I would definitely be a dad  like I would I would be there for my  kids but uh I just don’t think I’d be  good at it  oh especially not right now I think I  think I have a lot of maturing to do I  have a lot of problems myself and I need  to figure out I noticed that the volume  on my other videos was like ridiculous  so I’m drawing something new this time  just seeing if I can fix it because I’m  not I don’t do  like editing on this what you hear is  what you get I just I just I get on here  and I let myself rant ramble and whatnot  I streamed on Twitch earlier I’m doing  so much shit right now like I’m trying  to use all my outlets you know to to  reach as many people as possible and  it’s not like I have a message beyond  like yo eat a dick fuck you you know I  don’t have like a serious message or  anything and I just I mean to not  tonight’s podcast this this might seem a  little like more serious than the others  you know except for the are Kelly’s  balls wet part but uh I really won’t be  doing this a lot I don’t think I mean  still if I have an issue and I think  that you know someone else might have  the same issue I’m gonna start doing  that like I’ll start um I’ll be  introspective I’ll tell you how I found  it  and I’ll tell you what steps I’m gonna  take to to fix it I mean that’s kind of  what I kind of what I did just now and  I’ll tell you if it works you know so  maybe maybe someone out there doesn’t  have all this spare time around to you  know be introspective but I do so it’s  almost like a responsibility then at  that point with great power comes all  the bitches that’s the that’s the motto  I think I’ll do another 10 minute here  oh I’m hoping to have some people on but  like my friends won’t talk to me all my  old friends they just don’t want to talk  to me anymore I think I think I has a  lot to do with what I just talked about  I don’t know  I mean whatever it is I’ll be the bigger  person I’m sorry guys should come back  though it was nice having somebody to  talk to besides me  talking to me it’s fucking crazy having  conversations with me is difficult I  mean I haven’t um you know talked to  myself this much and for as long as I  can remember but doing this podcast  seems that it seems to help me  rationalize my own ideas I don’t know um  I don’t know where all the integrity is  going these days I haven’t always  practiced integrity haven’t always had  it at the forefront of my entity but I I  always knew that I needed to so that’s  something that I’m trying to do now just  work on that and develop a solid sense  of integrity so that I can be a better  person because I’ve let people down in  the past pretty pretty big and you know  I don’t feel good about it so so I’m  trying to fix that um that’s about all I  got to say it or not though this has  been the worst case scenario

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